Hell Week

We are in that portion of the year when no one is getting enough sleep, everyone is getting sick from the stress, and most people have at least one breakdown. Not exactly the best environment for someone struggling with severe depression and anxiety. I get to this place where I am so stressed and overwhelmed by everything that needs to be done, that I just shut down so nothing gets done. Which in reality does absolutely nothing to help the stress so I really don't know why I do that.

All and all Hell week hasn't been going to bad. I've been consistenly getting everything on my to do list for the day done, and haven't freaked out much. Then for some reason today, I felt like I was losing my mind. First, I had a three hour final in statistics lab. It was torture, and I was about ready to run out of that class crying. Then, I had a very emotional appointment with my new counselor, in which I shared the very personal letter I had to write for hw to my dad, and we both cried. Then, I got the headache of all headaches, and came back to the dorms feeling sick and miserable. It was at that point that I realized I really hadn't eaten in two days. I do that when I get in my depressed modes, which I've been in lately. So after forcing myself to eat a little, I realized that it was after seven, and I hadn't even started on hw yet.

Thankfully, I have an amazing wing, the gals I live with are so amazing. First I had a nice chat with my friend, and then once she helped me calm down some I went into the lobby to work on hw. I took my new anxiety med, which made me feel really calm and sleepy, which was nice but also made it hard to focus. When I went into the lobby there were two other gals out there, one of which had just had a cry fest and we had a nice long chat which ended in watching a funny comedy act. With this mood lifter I was able to get my hw done, take a shower, and now I am feeling relatively calm and I think I will be able to get to bed soon. I'm not going to want to get up tomorrow morning for class, and I still don't know how I am going to get everything done, but I don't have to go home this weekend, and at least for now I feel okay.